decade apart

a decade has passed, but it never seemed so fast.


still remember how indifferent it sounded when first came out.

just like how indifferent I was.

how it became my favorite beat was like how I regretted I hadn’t known it sooner.

if only I had got closer…

a decade away, the 26th of this day.

the coincident is like a surprise I have been waiting through the decade.

a surprise as if she would be again mine.

but she never was.


Time does not attribute much these days

It has been ten years since the last purchase of converse shoes. Besides some issues like inconsistent quality, the main reason for not buying any in the interval was very much a problem of size since in this lopsided city where shoes sellers usually import shoes sized no larger than US 10. Hard time finding shoes the right size is the common frustration of people with ‘big feet’.
This one new release however, does appear to bear certain potential other than its outward appearance. Though some unpleasant experience was met in the past, the desire to have another try is not ignorable. As usual, eBay is generally the place for items that’s not available here.

Price is ok and delivery is fast; only, the problems supposed should’ve been fixed in these ages make their return.


somewhat crooked outer plastic layer


dirt seems to be glued to the plastic surface


another persepctive


more obvious this angle


the left one’s plastic binding is crooked. note the left most ledge and the levels difference between two shoes.


the left side is lowered


the right side raised


To put up with these flaws is exactly the reason why there was not one pair of converse shoes in the box for the bygone decade.

I begin to understand why vans and other brands are selling overwhelming good nowadays. Although not some high fashion stuff, such quality in this day and age should in no way be allowed to pass QC. Yet for almost one third more the price of most models of its competitors, flaws continue to fly.

Disappointment is an understatement.


It was my rationality that’s ruining everything, but also the very same that keeps us alive.

I can no longer tell it what to do; it began to think for itself.

Such was never something I committed to, but was compelled to.

We are no longer of the green we were and certainly safe from our imaginations.

Yet we will still be die-trying to have the chance we hadn’t had enough.

But time is our enemy, and it gets stronger by second.

prose #1

While making his way home, he would imagine a conversation with a good elder, mentor, friend, or stranger who has profound recognition of this society and the world.

Convincing would it be to say he is wiser beyond his behavior as of now, but no one really understand why his conduct remain still a child’s in so many aspects.

So the sagacious person asks.

“You have grown, but still much to learn.”

“Indeed it would be.”

“But your behavior tells otherwise, it happens you ain’t so willingly to grown up kid.”

“Tell you what, I can grow up if I wish to, I can advance if I want to, I can throw away everything behind me if I care less enough like one another who has no means whatsoever to preserve what’s not retrievable if lost.”

A long sigh he exhales, and continues.

“People in this world have been pushed to grow up, they never really contemplated well enough before being urged to be a man or a woman for whatever purposes they’re required, they don’t even have time to think about the whole thing before the persons who dim themselves wise enough to decide how to think for the young. Do you even know why you want to grow up? Or what it meant to be?”

The man, with authority in his voice says.

“It’s not like you want to or not, only a child’s brain would produce such theory; it is only natural in every person’s DNA to become, not stay. It is shown in evolution, we adopt and we endure. You grow up when you do, there isn’t an option to pause your life in one way or the other, do you just realize what’s in your head is unreal and inefficient?”

“This is a choice; we have a choice, only fellow like you and obviously like anybody have forgotten how to make one. This is a trap of mass consciousness, when everyone around you thinks the same, inevitably you’re appealed to comply, because it feels safer to fall in a trap together than survive alone in the jungle. It’s how they exploit the weakness of every human’s consciousness to shape them the way they want, and while people like me try to resist by choosing the other way around, their agents, you fellows, the mass with unconscious consciousness would defend the doctrine they key in your mind by attacking us the bearers of the extinct cognition in human race.”

His audience is now astonished, but still disapproving.