Twisted wisdom

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it took more of determination and little of courage to have it at last undone.

for the agony lasted about some eight years, at first the eruption from gum without sign, with pain followed about half year till they fully grown; then the gaps perfect to be hideouts for particles and took innumerable tooth picks for the years battling such filth. like many others, the lower two grew completely horizontal toward against the permanent tooth next to them, the upper one although vertical, was sharp like canine tooth which had been cutting the lower gum since it’s sprout.

enough have I decided after all these years of indetermination when the gaps were filled with germ which commenced slowly to rot the nearby. permanent removal was the only solution.

dentists are not hard to spot over this city, economical ones are near extinction just like any other medical services here. for a feasible and affordable cause, this land I used to visit regularly just north of this city was the only one I could recall.

like when I was young, train is the only and best transport that will take me straight to the place without interchanging vehicles in the process. thrice would I take this train every once a week, for the first time the two on the left, and the second the one on the right, and the last to remove the sutures.

concern was not avoidable regarding the service or product this land has to offer to her people, especially medical. yet luck was only in time for me to catch that the night before the operation a friend of mine also a friend of the doctor who got his own tooth unplugged sent his friend a note about another victim would be at the butcher room tomorrow – special care and discount would be very nice.

the pain was less than I was expecting when it came, but I sensed it was more painful for the doc to pull these damnable roots out of this god forsaken jaw of mine when even the nurse needed to pull together with him. both times took less than an hour, but the pain lasted for several more that only soft and cool foods were edible in the first few days. merely a week was enough to stop the pain and the bleeding, but the gigantic empty socket will take likely more than a month or two to be filled by new gum, despite within a month the doc said.

only regret was that I forgot literally totally to keep the first two tooth when the only thing in my mind was to get the hell out of that killing floor as soon as possible. the last one was just remembered when I by chance saw it on the plate.


Fed up

job like the dream

flexible time

mostly casual work

operate alone

sometimes fucked up shit

untrustworthy boss

under average wage

unsystematic working process

a job that requires a mind to be multifaceted

highly prohibited to express yourself which deemed exaggeration

need to be careful to colleagues that want to slip burdens and responsibilities to you

thought I will stick in this firm for long, only now I want to get all the advantages and quit.

four months already got me woken up with headache, can’t imagine any longer.

although the beginning of one thing, already I can see the end of many others.

when I can’t keep my consciousness flowing for longer than ten minutes, legitimately I can’t stop the conscience of mine keep asking questions like what does this job bring but some little cash ample to resist starvation in MacDonald or KFC; with colleagues considering eating better than this extravagant, who’s paid better than me and stripped the right of choices by themselves at the age when they barely afforded fast food.

days are burning, I am drying.

wanna fuck this up once and for all, but what other shit will I do other than this?

when I am not asked to choose I know always how to.

clock is ticking and I don’t feeling like thinking.

should I really lower my expectation of nowadays film

perhaps the book is fine, but without a certain subjective corrective perception no one would be much readily understanding the meanings behind these unpremeditated actings.

for as much as we may well know, few actors actually read the entire scripts of the films they are on set, or the entire story, and fewer actually read the book itself.

this may be one perfect example of some fellows having their chances getting names from something they don’t and don’t bother to understand.

imdb and rotten were generous, the first time I reckon.


this one sounds times better.

“I’m sick of a system where the richest man gets the most beautiful girl if he wants her, where the artist without an income has to sell his talents to a button manufacturer.”
Amory Blaine
“Who’s he?”
“Well,” said Amory, “he’s a – he’s a intellectual personage not very well known at present.”

no longer young and beautiful?

22nd change of seasons and two weeks tomorrow,
busy living this world,
time flies and I don’t know why.

Went on theater for Gatsby with friend who didn’t read the book,
knew Leonardo should have done this role at least once,
sensation and memories reminded,
good conversation wherefrom.

Hot summer night,
tried to write something inspired in the dinner,
ring of my phone,
oh, more works are tomorrow…

A paranormal romantic zombie comedy film

Love story in a world full of walking dead, have heard enough, but much unlike this one.
Never rated a comedy this good, probably the best zombie theme ever seen.
It gives me the space, the creativity or the originality that allows me to be bold to spaculate once again the ecstasy I have already lost.
That each of the two are trying hard to reach one another, their sworn enemy, like the story of Shakespeare.
The bond between the living and the dead, to exhume what is dead and to bring them back to life.

I guess I often felt for them, felt like I belong to them, disconnected, never felt easy in my own skin.
Felt like and accepted the rest of my day will pass like this.
Like how everyone around was doing the same.

And there she was, introducing that sling of spark to reactivate my unliving heart.

Began to pretend like never before, wished not to freak her out.
Why does a corpse mind about how one anther looks at his rotten face.

Perhaps just wanted to look better before her, not too dead.
Change for someone, probably the first time in my life, to be compatible for her.
To experience ecstasy collides with reality, be true with who she would be.

No…not like this…..